Monday, April 6th, 2009
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12:41 am - THE REVOLUTION!!!
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I had a really wonderful weekend.
Consider this a tribute to all the people in my life who make it worth living.
Clyde's weekend starring:
Trigger
Emma
Gonad
Suckboy
Lia
Richard (Rant)
Allen (Crown tech dude)
Arthur (Ozani)
Eddie
Vincent
Kiri
Brad
Luka
Cari-an
Emily
Margaret
Henry
Lisa
Tannie
Lili
Almasy
Zara
Morgan
Mina
Cas
Megan
Craig
Diana
Brody
Trey
CC
Daniel (Shadz)
Sage
Tim
Hwan-Yi
Rea
Nakey
Gin
Jellyman
Deat
Yason (Names)
Akino Yakushi (Forgot real name)
Bech
Nick
Tyrone
Chuck
Adi
Aldi
Dude building a Gadessa (?)
Gumby
Planky
Maloney
Cody
Dion
Tom
Cori
Bianca
Simon
Daywalker
George
David (Film buff)
This was very special. Not just for the number of people I saw. Not just for the varying degrees of depth in the exchanges I had. Not just for the random chain of events. Not just for the lack of shitty downfalls. I can't quite say it now but it was special and I never want to forget it.
current mood: Clyde
current music: Clyde
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(29 comments | comment on this)
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Monday, February 23rd, 2009
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7:41 pm - THE REVOLUTION!!!
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I woke up this morning disappointed.
I had a dream and what I remember of it was two parts. The first part is a girl I know tickling my leg while I'm diagnosing a computer or something.
The second part is my brother and I talking about astronomy or some shit. Now I know nothing about astronomy. And I'm not sure what my brother knows but I do know that he has some pretty off-beat shit in that head of his. Now he brings up a subject and I say something like "Isn't that a celestial body?" then he says "No. It's actually an alentical body." I had never heard that word before.
Now because my mind has been destroyed by the internet, my brain is unable to go through a body of text where an unknown word is used and work backwards to discover the meaning. All it can think is "[ctrl]+C -> google bar -> definition." So my dream went all bugfuck. I suddenly knew I was in a dream and HAD TO WAKE UP TO GET ON GOOGLE. Asking my brother in the dream world then and there meant nothing.
So I woke up and tried it. Google search for "Alentical" "Allentical" "Alenntical" and "Allenntical." I got nothing but gibberish. I was really disappointed. Just the thought of acquiring new knowledge from dreams... as though we could reach external channels... that we're always "online" so to speak. Or if not... the possibility that a dream could have penetrated the deepest recesses of my memory and found something so obscure, it would have seemed like new knowledge to me would have been awesome. I had already read about cases of Xenoglossy and stuff like the cuckoo song. Though I never really believed in reincarnation. I thought of those cases as a possibility for augmented subconscious learning or even ESP or some shit. So yeah... I was kind of hoping I'd tapped into that.
This paranormal cock-block has happened to me before too. It was when I was a kid playing Mario 64 and couldn't work out where to get the wing hat switch. I had a dream that you could get it in the same place as the blue invisible hat switch. I went to play Mario 64 and was really depressed.
current mood: Raged
current music: Ai oboete imasu ka? (Bless the little queen)
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(9 comments | comment on this)
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Monday, January 19th, 2009
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11:36 pm - THE REVOLUTION!!!
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I just heard a joke today. It was a pretty funny joke. I was laughing for a good minute or so because it was so funny. But I can't for the life of me remember what the joke was.
current mood: Retarded
current music: Retarded Persona 4 battle theme
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(12 comments | comment on this)
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Wednesday, November 19th, 2008
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1:46 am - THE REVOLUTION!!!
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My father called me on my mobile phone and he address me as "bro."
current mood: Depressed
current music: Where da hood at - DMX
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(4 comments | comment on this)
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Tuesday, September 30th, 2008
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3:40 pm - THE REVOLUTION!!!
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Tuesday, July 8th, 2008
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11:20 pm - THE REVOLUTION!!!
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When I was 16, I had a punching bag. I wouldn't use it very much. I'd just sort of see it when walking to the door and I'd give it a good smack. But every now and then I'd go all out on it. Well... as much as I could. The beam it was suspended from was REALLY high up and the chain was really long. So it would go for really long swings and I couldn't really get the combos going. But it was good because it would be good practice for punching straight by trying to avoid making the bag spin around. But yeah... I didn't use it so much so my hands weren't exactly toughened by it and it would get dirt and dust and stuff on it without me noticing. One time there must have been some sand or something that stuck to it because before I knew it, my knuckles were bleeding. I thought that was so damn hardcore I kept going at it harder and harder until all the skin from my right middle and ring finger knuckles was gone. I wasn't even punching it. I was scraping it. Rubbing. Slowly. Bracing for the pain. Then faster and faster until I couldn't control it. I jumped up on the bag and wrapped my legs around it while biting the top of it and bashing the side with my bloody right hand. The vibrations going through it as I bashed it went directly to my groin and I was feeling arousal and pain at the same time and started rocking on it and thrusting while I kept on punching and screaming.
It was at that moment I think I finally understood what love was. Giving pain. Receiving pain. Giving pleasure. Receiving pleasure. I don't think I've ever felt as strongly for anything in this world as I did for that punching bag that day. After I climaxed I hung on resting my neck against it's chain... stroking it's leather skin... biting that seatbelt material strap... my semen made the red blood on the side glossier.
I was pretty sad when they took it away soon after they found me. But I suppose it's for the better. I think any longer would have spoiled me and any expectations of lovers to come. It's already bad enough I have trouble talking to women.
current mood: Eating Bratwrust
current music: Freestailo - R. Lizer (Kazakh Idol)
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(12 comments | comment on this)
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Monday, June 9th, 2008
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5:13 am - THE REVOLUTION!!!
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Sunday, June 1st, 2008
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11:11 pm - THE REVOLUTION!!!
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Wednesday, May 21st, 2008
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4:36 am - THE REVOLUTION!!!
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Oh wow... what a weekend. So much stuff happened. Saw so many awesome people.
But I won't tell you about it.
Today I went to check the mail to see if I'd gotten a reply from my nigga in DC. I didn't. All I got were some results from the clinic. While I was at the mailbox, I saw one of the boys from my street playing with my cat, Katze. I observed for a while until he realized I was watching him. He was a bit scared of me at first because all children are afraid of me. I'm one of those people that animals and children seem to dislike. Which is fine. Every guy I know seems to be an animal person/kid person. But they don't seem to be a girl person because they keep repeating the fact that they are animal/kid people to girls they like who don't like them.
Anyway... the kid sees me and is all scared. He immediately apologizes for playing with my cat as though he'd done something wrong. I just laughed and said it was okay and that he could play with my cat if he wanted. So he played with him for a bit all the while looking over his shoulder at me. After looking at him for about five minutes, he said he was going home to pee. I told him he could use my bathroom. He was a bit reluctant but I convinced him it was okay.
We go into my bathroom and I stand against the wall while he stands over the toilet. He tells me he can't go while I'm watching. I just snort disappointedly and leave him alone in the bathroom. While I'm outside, I wait until I hear piss hitting the water surface of the toilet and I honk my airhorn as a harmless prank. I hear the boy panic for a bit and I ask if he's okay. He tells me not to come in but I come in anyway because he sounds scared of something. Upon walking inside the bathroom I see that he's made a mess everywhere, including on his person. I tell him that I'm a bit disappointed with him but we can clean the bathroom together. So I get a mop while he wipes down the bowl. When we're done with the bathroom, I tell him that it's not quite over. "What do you mean he asks?" I tell him that we still need to do something about him. He was covered in his own urine. I tell him to take his clothes of for me to wash and get into the bath. He really doesn't want to and says he can go home for that. I tell him that won't do because I don't want him dirtying the rest of my house when he leaves.
He eventually complies. I put his clothes in the washing machine while he was in the bath. Then I return to the bathroom to his protests. He doesn't want me to see him bathing apparently. I tell him that I'm going to see that he's cleaned up good and if he doesn't let me make sure of that then I'll tell his parents that he pissed all over my house. He shut up and started sobbing while I took my clothes off and got in the bath with him.
:)
current mood: Thmiley Faeth
current music: Bill O'Reilly - Fuck it. We'll do it live. (remix)
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(6 comments | comment on this)
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Wednesday, May 14th, 2008
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8:29 pm - THE REVOLUTION!!!
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I was at the train station minding my own business waiting for my train. I was too tired to play with my DS or read my book or whatever so I just sat and stared at stuff. There was this big fat retarded guy who looked to be in his 30s or 40s or something. He was waddling around picking up metcards off the seats in the shelter. The metcards that were on the floor... he would ask people to pick up for him which was pissing me off. Eventually, he got to my corner of the shelter where a pissed-off looking Asian high school girl was listening to her music and another pissed-off looking Asian dude was playing his PSP. The retard made sure to talk at them extra loudly (and even less audibly) and make the whole situation even more awkward. The Asians eventually complied and picked up the metcards on the floor around them. Then he asked me to pick up a metcard at my feet to which I just smiled at him.
Okay... those of you that know me and have seen my wallet know that it's retardedly thick because it's stuffed with various business cards, change from Bluehouse and a deck of used metcards I never dispose of. I keep the metcards there for when there are inspectors on the train. I like to take my sweet time going through about... eighty cards while they stand there with their dicks in their hands. While I've been keeping them, some lucky fare evader has just gotten to a station and can go on without paying a fine.
Anyway... so I had a deck of used metcards that the retard would have wanted. So I stood up and kicked the the metcard by my feet along the floorboards of the shelter. The retard couldn't take his eye off it. Then I pulled out my deck of metcards and threw them in the air one at a time and he would chase them in the air and try and catch them. As it turns out... he can bend over and pick up metcards if he wants to. He would just rather ask other people. So I start walking and throwing my metcards out one at a time until we're out of the shelter and on to the platform while retard boy eats them up like pac-man. After he's caught about three in mid air without picking one off the ground, I throw one off the platform. He chases it and falls on to the tracks. I piffed what was left of my metcards at his head. I ran out of the station screaming like a mujahideen with that "ALALALALALALALA!" shit. I went into a Korean restaurant and ate bulgogi while laughing my ass off. The Koreans didn't know what I was laughing at but they found it funny too. But they didn't get to see him rolling on his tummy, blubbering and making a kind of sea otter barking noise in pain and calling out "Helen... haaaalp me. *bark* I've faaaaallen. *bark* Haaaaalp meeee..."
That's one of the greatest things to happen to me this week.
current mood: Accomplished
current music: Ohhh... you touch my tra la la...
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(21 comments | comment on this)
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Tuesday, May 6th, 2008
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3:25 am - THE REVOULTION!!!
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Fuck Facebook
Seriously... this is killing what made the internet awesome in the first place. I don't know WHY idiots would want to give out their personal details and define their persona that strongly. I don't know why anybody want to read some of the boring data and metadata that people's lives are reduced to with hardly any emotional connotation. I don't know how I could be the kind of guy who uses it as a "a business tool" to network because all the people who I like would probably be a step backwards to networking and "business." Maybe it's because I'm the kind of guy who's got plenty to hide. Which is fine. I hate myself and for that I love myself.
But yeah... web 2.0 is shitting me more and more. It's getting harder to escape reality which was the old internet was awesome. And the escapes provided like WoW or Second Life don't appeal to me that much because they're like all the other web 2.0 with their standardized formats.
What the fuck am I talking about?
current mood: Eyes are sore
current music: Cup of Brown Joy - Elemental
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(9 comments | comment on this)
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Wednesday, April 23rd, 2008
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2:26 am - THE REVOULTION!!!
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There's this bus that goes near my house. The 824. A bunch of kids catch it to go to the nearby catholic high-school. I catch the bus way to the train station though. I sorta kinda know the kids. I just know of them as my neighbours' kids. And nobody these days really knows their neighbours that well anyway.
Anyway... for one week, I noticed that the usual Moorabbin transit bus that picked them up was replaced by a smaller shuttlebus with the route number on a simple sign inside the windshield. The passengers would get on and it was business as usual. Then I'd get on my bus the other way about a minute later.
On thursday I was running late because I lost my lucky red garter. I ran to the bus stop and saw the kids going to school were already gone and my bus taking off. I was pretty pissed off and the day was looking terrible without my garter. I sat at the bus stop for a minute trying to think of some better excuse for being late (people don't understand the importance of garters) when I saw the big lumbering Moorabbin transit that I was used to bus pull in at the stop. It was mostly empty too.
It was yesterday I was told by mother that the sons of the Indian family on our street went missing.
I think I'm the only one who knows...
current mood: Burnt
current music: Gil Mantera's Party Dream - Elmo's Wish
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(6 comments | comment on this)
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Saturday, April 19th, 2008
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3:24 am - THE REVOULTION!!!
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...put this up they asshole before they drop it. Jesus... you may have dropped it. You definitely have a different way of doin' it. You a bride. A very attractive bride I might add. Don't let that... don't let it go to your head. One time Princess Diana told me that I was a little bit attractive. And I admit it. I was weird for... ten years after that. I let it go to my head. I was going to clubs. You know what I mean? With like... cold nipples and shit. And I couldn't figure out... after nine and a half years I couldn't figure out why it didn't work. And it was when I figured out it DID work. But then I still had six months of trying it over and over and hating myself more and more and putting dark eyeliner on my eyes. Just to cover up how puffy my eyes really were. But I've grown up since then...
current mood: Coked
current music: Meds - Placebo
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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Friday, March 28th, 2008
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4:19 pm - THE REVOLUTION!!!
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I have no life to report. I'm sorry but I've failed you all. I just want feedback. Any form of feedback. My handle on reality is fucked. I need to be reminded I'm alive.
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(13 comments | comment on this)
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Monday, March 17th, 2008
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10:11 pm - THE REVOLUTION!!!
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Wednesday, February 13th, 2008
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2:48 pm - THE REVOULTION!!!
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On the weekend I did stuff. I drank lots of alcohol with Slick. I played lots of Third Strike with Asian newbies who don't realise there are characters other than Ken during Chinese New Year. And some other silly shit.
A few years back, I had this idea for making something like a video store. But for books. People would come in and rent out books for a few dollars and stuff and it would be great. I wrote down how it would work and how much money I'd be making and stuff. Then I went the next day and I went out and saw that THE MAN (AKA THE FUCKING GOVERNMENT) went and jacked my idea. No kidding. And to stiff me even more, they made the book rentals FREE. Such fucking bullshit. How do they expect anybody to progress or any economic growth if I CAN'T GET RICH? Fuck the fucking government keeping me down. We need to be libertarians like all those guys in America. Now you know they're onto a good thing. They have guns.
Yesterday I went to the "library" looking for Kafka on the Shore. The computer said that the only copy was in South Oakleigh. With nothing better to do that day, I walked about 4km to the that particular "library branch." I got there and saw they they were closed. They were only open on monday and thursdays. And for a total of about 6 hours a week. Jesus... what's the point of even being there? Seriously... it's South Oakleigh. People don't read books in South Oakleigh. Stupid fucking government giving people the benefit of the doubt.
A woman in a Toyota pulled up in the car park while I was peering inside vainly hoping that somebody was in there. I showed her the opening hours sign and she also thought it was stupid. She suggested the matter be fixed by only having two days in a week. Monday and thursday. I suggested adding more days to the seven day week specifically for the "library" to be open. People wouldn't work, study or worship. They'd just go to the "library." I think my idea excited her and awoke long forgotten passion and arousal in her. Maybe she'd undo her blouse and slide out of her slacks to reveal a scandalous g-string. Then strut over to her car bend over through window with her ample rear pointed at me to turn the CD player on with My Neck, My Back pumping in the car park. Then she'd playfully saunter over to me and put her arms around my neck and let her upper weight fall back while straddled my right thigh to grind into before swinging me onto the bench by the returns chute for me to recline on while she mounts me in a reverse cowgirl position, thrusting powerfully with breathy gasps escaping her glossy red lips. I could have been wrong about this but I'm pretty sure I was right.
I walked home kind of shitted off with the whole deal. When I got about, 2km from the "library" I noticed my garter had fallen around my ankle again. So I put my foot up on a low fence and adjusted it back below my knee. I didn't think anything of it at the time. But an hour later I would come to regret that. You all know how my pockets are bulging with stuff right? Well... on this particular day, my left pocket had my phone and my brother's pocket torch in it. I also happened to have a hole in my pocket from when I had keys in there. Well... this is what happened. The torch must have been on for a while in my pocket without me knowing it because I found the batteries drained when I got home. While the torch was shining, it must have hit the camera button on phone when I raised my leg. The phone had the lens pointing through the hole of my pocket at my penis. After well-lit photo of my penis was taken and I continued walking home, it must have hit the "Send" button.
I got home without incident. Took my shoes off and emptied my pockets. I saw the torch was on and was dim as hell. Then I saw I had a message on my phone. I opened it and it said.
u fucking retard. my
manager saw my
fone wen u sent that
shit. what the fuck is
wrong with u?if u get
off to teenage girls
looking at ur groddy
cock then u will enjoy
it when i show evry
body on msn
I closed the inbox and behind that there was the camera on standby with a picture of my dick.
Fuck.
current music: The Veronicas - Shitty song
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(9 comments | comment on this)
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Wednesday, February 6th, 2008
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7:05 am - THE REVOLUTION!!!
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Monday, February 4th, 2008
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11:48 am - THE REVOLUTION!!!
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Ouch.
I had a fucked up weekend. Lots of shit happened. But shit always happens. Always with the shit happening. Why do humans do shit? They just don't fucking stop. Always...
I could probably write about it but it wouldn't be honest. I'd lie to myself. I'd lie to you. My version of events is always fucked up. Times, places, faces, events... they don't add up... things aren't accounted for. There's an X factor going on. There's somebody trying reading this I don't want to. You know who you are. You know your time is coming.
At approximately 7.39 am on Sunday the 3rd of February... I saw two men making out on a bench at Southbank. One of the men was stradling the other and grinding into him. As far as I could see... their pants were on and as far as I could tell, there was no way for swords to be fencing or stabbing. When I was out of view I ran over to a blind spot above them on a ledge and watched them continue until 7.46 am.
current mood: Ouch...
current music: None because music is for assholes
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(11 comments | comment on this)
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Tuesday, January 29th, 2008
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4:33 am - THE REVOLUTION!!!
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I don't know how to write an LJ entry.
Any questions?
current mood: Don't wanna break these chains
current music: Poison - Alice Cooper
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(6 comments | comment on this)
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Saturday, January 26th, 2008
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8:10 pm - THE REVOLUTION!!!
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clydev's journal
